04 December 2006

BFF - No, really . . . forever

I'm skipping the shame spiral this time around. It has been months and months since my last post, but at least I had good intentions to blog. I mental blogged - I thought about it, was encouraged to do it, but I never sat down to do it. Now that the semester is nearly over, I feel like I have a little more time to sit and reflect.

I know that everyone is in Christmas frenzy, but I want to roll the clock back a few weeks to Thanksgiving. Even though I swore I was too old to pile in a van with my siblings for a car trip, I ended up driving Mom, Laura, Stephanie, and Daniel down to Atlanta to meet my Dad (on his way home from New Orleans). Once in Atlanta, we invaded the home of my great-aunt Anita and auntie Deborah. I smothered my sweet-a aunt Anita with kisses and gave my auntie Deborah a bear hug then I promptly fell asleep and let the others finish making the Thanksgiving meal.

Before we started gathering for Thanksgiving dinner, Anita received a special Thanksgiving treat. Her friend, Mrs. Haddad came over for a visit. Anita began working for Mrs. Haddad over 50 years ago. They became very close and Mrs. Haddad's family became Anita's family. After Anita retired, Mrs. Haddad would drive over to Anita's to sit and chat in Anita's front room. Their frequent visits (as well as visits from Mrs. Haddad's son and grandchildren) were ended by Katrina. Anita went to Atlanta while Mrs. Haddad remained in the New Orleans area.

Now Anita and Mrs. Haddad look forward to their phone calls and rare visits. It is really so sweet to see them together talking about the past and their families. I wonder how their friendship has lasted so long, what has kept them together over 50 years, a catastrophic hurricane, and many other obstacles.

I've started my own friendship with Anita's "other" family. Over Thanksgiving, Heather, Lauren, and I commiserated over the fact that the doctors at the hospitals where we work look nothing like the doctors on Grey's Anatomy. Stephen and I discussed music. It looks like the friendship between our families will continue to grow . . .

Sara and I have only been friends for 20 years (since the 4th grade). We drifted apart and back together again about a million times - Sara told me in the 6th grade that she had to dump me in favor of more popular kids (she hates when I tell that story) and I told Sara in the 8th grade that our friendship had lost its zing. We were very odd children. Despite all of the pre-adolescent, big banged, aqua mascara tinged back stabbing, we are still friends. We had dinner together last month in Asheville and we laughed and laughed . . . you would have thought it was Field Day 1986.

That's the thing that I am looking for - what brings us together despite egos, pride, pettiness, and all of the other things that get in the way. As much as I wish that my Thanksgiving was a big, happy reunion, it wasn't. We had a little family falling out. I only hope that we can all find that something that binds us.

So now we can roll the clock back to the present. I have papers to write, presents to make (yes, make), and a dog to play with.

Until next time,

PS: Here are two songs to enjoy: a little brazilian music and a little scottish music. "
If Looks Could Kill" by Camera Obscura and "Bem Querer (My Dear)" by Seu Jorge.

1 comment:

Virtuous said...

I loved this post! So open and real!